"I wasn't listening to the Bible - I was listening to Jesus speak directly to me"

India

"What do you have to worry about? You have everything!"

"Yeah, I wish we could have it as bad as you!" His friends laughed.

Manas looked at them—he took a slow drag on his cigarette—it was always the same reaction he got when he tried to say anything about his life. His friends only saw the things his family had, the houses, the businesses, the education . . .

They didn't understand. He didn't even understand—why was he so empty inside?

He was so tired of trying to figure it out. The more he tried, the more it all seemed to be one big empty joke. Everything he saw around him was empty and pointless, and everything inside him felt empty and pointless too.

He dropped the subject, along with his hopes, in the dust along with his cigarette butt.

They headed out to party for the night. He'd been partying a lot more lately—drugs, girls—trying to fill the gaping hole swallowing him whole.

Why did he exist? What was the point of life? No one had any answers. He visited the gods and goddesses of India, trying to get peace. He just left with more turmoil than before. He visited a tantrik baba. The tantrik sat there with one foot over his head, surrounded by a circle of ashes. A couple of skulls lay nearby. Then the tantrik told him that only those who go beyond time, space and causation to become immortal can be in harmony, and that he needed to be in a state of equilibrium where he was not devastated by grief or influenced by worldly happiness.

"Yeah, that's kind of what I've been trying to do," Manas thought. He left completely frustrated.

On top of everything, his family was becoming more and more unhappy with him. He was known as a street Romeo, always following girls, and his community had reprimanded him a couple of times. Now, they were beginning to ostracize him.

Manas' discontentment had turned into desperation, and the desperation was tormenting him. He put his head in his hands—silently screaming into the endless, empty darkness.

That night he went out and did more drugs than ever. The torment, discontentment, and desperation sat on the edge of his consciousness like a trio of spectres—waiting. The next morning they were there, staring at him silently yet loudly from underneath their dark hoods.

He had to get out. He started walking—anywhere—trying to quiet his mind.

After awhile, he sat down. He saw a pretty girl walk by, so he started to follow her. She went into a church. He stood there, unsure what to do.

He heard a sound coming from inside. Voices, music . . . he recognized it as the Christian Bible. He didn't want to go in, so he stayed outside listening. As he listened, he realized he was feeling something he hadn't felt in almost as long as he could remember—peace.

After the listening was over, he walked home slowly. He had just experienced something new, but he wasn't quite sure what. That night, the words he had heard ran continuously through his mind, and he tossed and turned as his pounding heart kept him awake.

He got up as soon as it was morning and went straight to the church. He asked the pastor how he could know more about Christianity and Jesus.

The pastor invited him to the next Faith Comes By Hearing listening group to listen to the Audio Bible and gave him a Gospel of John and other Christian books to read. Manas went home and was so engrossed in reading that he didn't leave his house until the day of the listening group.

He says, "As long as I was reading the books, I felt peace in my heart. The day came, and I went to the church to listen to the Bible. The pastor started the program with prayer, and that day, I wasn't listening to the Audio Bible—I was listening to Jesus speak directly to me."

As Manas listened to God's Word, he says, "I came to know that God is love, which in my religion, I never came across. I started analyzing my life and found how far away from the truth I was without knowing the true God. I joined with the pastor in prayer and surrendered my total life to God's divine hand, and returned home with a joyful heart."

As Manas' life changed, his family noticed, but they didn't understand why he spent all of his time reading and praying and didn't go out with his friends anymore. When his parents wanted him to go to the pujas and rituals with them and he didn't, they found out he was following Jesus and began to harass him. One day—when he overheard them saying he had gone mad and needed mental help—he knew he needed to leave home.

For the first time in his life he needed a job. Though he had never worked before, he got a job in a sound shop as an electrician and technician. He has now been working there for three years.

While others looked at Manas as privileged before, he knows that he is truly privileged now. He says, "I am privileged to know God and the truth through listening to the Audio Bible. Today, I am a new man with a new personality. The true and loving God has granted me eternal life."